The period of pre-adolescence can be regarded as a period starting from 9 to 12 years of age; it is during this period children experience maximal changes in their development. This stage comes with so many changes that preteen children undergo different changes physically and emotionally, which may at one point affect their behaviour and thus bring about a number of problems even to their parents. It is characterised as a time where people want an identity of their own, become more conscious and learn more about themselves. 

Here, we have discussed some of the behaviours that parents are likely to note in their children at their preteen ages, and some tips on positive discipline and practice.

Understanding Preteen Behaviour

They are children, but not toddlers anymore. They are neither teenagers but have not reached puberty yet, that is why they are preteens. This transitional phase also has its bard of behaviours, most of which are as a result of the internal and external transitions they are undergoing.

Desire for Independence

There is a growing sense of independence that one notices in preteens unlike in the past for instance. They may begin to challenge authority and demand some independence of ‘non-conventionality’ in regards to their choices and behaviours.This is rather typical for such an age when children establish their own personalities or rather personal identities.

Emotional Fluctuations

Children of preteen age are very sensitive and tend to get moody or could easily get angered. Furthermore, these emotional variations may be due to hormonal changes that occur when the child enters puberty to become more sensitive, irritable or easily frustrated.

Peer Influence

The peer influence increases during the preteen age, making children of such age more concerned with conformity. This can lead to a dilemma on how to balance satisfying friends' needs while at the same time respecting family’s code of ethics and conduct.

Increased Self-Consciousness

This is so because as preteens grow more conscious of themselves and of other people’s impression of them they may develop anxiety over their looks, skills and rank. Such an increased attention to one’s self often results in increased anxiety, self doubt or withdrawal from social interactions.

Testing Boundaries

This is pretty much part and parcel of preadolescence where the child is seen to rebel and challenge the authority of the parents or caregiver. Such a behaviour they practise in order to rebel and do as they pleased, to find out as long as they can get it. Sometimes it can be quite infuriating, notwithstanding, it is quite helpful when we understand that it is a development stage.

Positive Discipline Strategies for Preteens

The way of disciplining preteens has to be strict but also to take into consideration that children are not yet teenagers. This approach of discipline entails demonstration of good behaviours and correcting the child where he or she goes wrong without focusing on the punishment as the secret of changing the preteen.

Set Clear Expectations and Consequences

It is for this reason that preteens need to know them as well as the impacts of violating those rules. Be clear and consistent to your child in your working directions, so that your child understands what is required of them. If rules are violated, it is important that the corrective measures that are applied are reasonable, uniform and proportional to the infraction committed.

Encourage Open Communication

Encourage your preteen to discuss what they are going through, what is bothering him/her or if he/she made a mistake. They should be encouraged to speak out their feelings and nobody should scold or condemn them for what they are saying. This assists in creating trust and working on creating an environment that will make them realise that they are protected even if they err.

Model Respectful Behaviour

Preteens are good observers and most of the time try to mirror the behaviours of people within their close proximity. Calm down when addressing others and show respect and empathy and you will find your child copying the same.

Use Positive Reinforcement

Use positive reinforcement in encouragement to improve good behaviour. Rewarding your preteen also enhances his sense of self worth and will make him eager to keep making the right decision. Conciliate great importance on the particular actions you would like changed including having homework done on time or doing household chores.

Teach Problem-Solving Skills

Assist your preteen learn how to solve problems by allowing him make decision concerning effects and measures. For instance, if they violate a rule, one should discuss with them what they believe the late should be given as a punishment or how they can avoid a possibility of repeating the action again. This enables responsibility and critical thinking to prevail thus enhancing the performance of the business.

Be Consistent with Discipline

The next thing that was viewed was the general observation made on the children, especially in matters relating to discipline and this can be articulated as follows: When rules and consequences are altered frequently then this can lead to confusion and deterioration of the concept of discipline. Religiously adhere to rules barked out, and be consistent with either rewarding or punishing a dog whenever a behaviour is exhibited.

Allow for Natural Consequences

At other occasions, it is good to let your preteen go through what you call natural consequences as a form of correction. For instance, if they fail to do homework as they were supposed to do it, they end up getting a low score. This makes them learn the lesson of responsibility so that they do not repeat the bad behaviour without having to be punished further.

Address Behavior, Not Character

While correcting your child, it is very important to remember not to label him/her. Don’t tell your child, ‘you are irresponsible’, tell him/her something like ‘finishing homework at the eleventh hour is irresponsible.’ Such language allows the kid to know what should change and what is wrong.

Managing Common Challenges

Of course, discipline is crucial for children of this age but it’s also crucial to realise that there are some difficulties that a child faces in preteenage and try to help him or her to pass them easily.

Handling Defiance

Behaviour refraction is among the major challenges that occur during the preteen age. That is why it is better to calm down and to look for the reasons for such behaviour in order to avoid defiance intentionally. Is he or she under pressure or has too much work to handle? Always go to the source of the problem and then approach the problem as a team.

Dealing with Peer Pressure

Bullying pressure from peers influences the pre teens to make wrong decisions that are contrary to their principles or family standards. Never hide the fact that peers can have a strong effect on your child and show them how to politely decline when needed. It can also aid in role playing in which they will get to act out how they will deal with peer pressure.

Navigating Mood Swings

That is why it can be so bad to deal with mood swings even if they appear out of the blue. Always allow your preteen time for cooling down when they are in a couple of bad moods about a certain issue. Accept them and tell them that it’s alright to cry since they are just boys and boys do cry sometimes.

The preteen years are developmental years whereby children learn new things, discover themselves, and may exhibit difficult behaviour. As a parent, it is helpful to understand the changes that your child is experiencing, accept the fact that this is a normal stage in the growth and development of every child and when using positive discipline techniques you are on the right track. Always note that discipline doesn’t mean to punish your child but rather to instil in him or her values necessary for him or her to become a responsible person in future.