Disciplining a school-age child can be a challenging task, but it is a crucial aspect of parenting that helps shape your child’s behaviour and character. When children are young, they get more adventurous and develop autonomy hence the need for proper guidance and penalties. Discipline does not mean punishment, but it means educating the child or child well-being about the right thing to do or wrong thing to do.

Let’s have a look at the behaviour of a school-age child and how to deal with it. 

Understanding School-Age Behaviour

Firstly, school-age children are those groups of children ranging from the age of 6 and up to 12 years of age. They are in the developmental state where they are in the process of establishing their identity and learning more about the environment and the world they live in.

Increased Independence

School-age children grow more independent and start, perhaps, rebellious, and try to go against the norms and standards that are put in place. People want to be self-directed and may not take kindly to being told what to do in what they consider unjust methods.

Peer Influence

Friendship plays a very crucial role in the lives of children at this age since they tend to lean towards friends a lot. He may emulate things from friends and this often creates conflict with what the parents expect in the child.

Developing Moral Understanding

Children are beginning to make their independent decisions of what is right and wrong and the effects of their actions. Still, their morality is not fully developed and they might have a hard time understanding the difference between fair and just, for instance.

Emotional Fluctuations

School-age children are capable of having strong feelings but are most times unable to control such feelings. They may scream, get angry, or shut down when they become upset or when too much is asked of them. Knowledge of behaviours of school-age children in these terms assists parents in practising tolerance and leniency during disciplining of the child because they are growing up controlling their emotions and general behaviour.

Positive Discipline Techniques

Positive discipline is all about correcting the child without punishing him or her. It assists children in knowing that their actions will attract some consequences and therefore should choose to follow the right things in future. Here are some effective positive discipline techniques. 

Set Clear Expectations

Teach the behavioural expectations of a good child or a good student very clearly. Abide by consistency and speak to the children in a nice language that they will understand when explaining the rules and why those rules are set. For example, “We don’t hit because it causes pain to others,” enables your child to learn about the consequences of his/her behaviour.

Consistent Consequences

The use of consequences means that some behaviour should not be allowed, so be careful to ensure that such consequences are administered in the correct manner. For instance, if a child is deprived of privileges for failing to do homework, it should so happen that the child loses privileges each time the undesirable behaviour is exhibited.

Use Time-Outs Effectively

It will then become imperative for parents to ensure that they set realistic goals that are beneficial to the children and employ time-out to help the children learn appropriate ways of behaving. However, it’s important to use them and swim. Time-outs should not exceed five and ten minutes and should not be punitive in nature, but as a way of helping the child decompose.

Positive Reinforcement

Perhaps the most effective way of maintaining good behaviour is to follow the ‘catch them being good’ method which involves praising or offering rewards to individuals who recorded good behaviour. Rewards can be as basic as the use of words such as ‘Good job!’, a star chart, or additional time to play. Positive reinforcement aids in boosting the morale of the child, in the process they understand that whatever they are doing is being observed by someone, and this is the kind of behaviour that is desirable.

Teach Problem-Solving Skills

Teach your child how to problem-solve by asking him/her to suggest a solution to a fight or any kind of unacceptable behaviour exhibited by him/her or his/her friends. For instance, if your child has a problem sharing with the sibling, sit down with the child and discuss ways you can come up with the best solution that will in future make both siblings happy.

Model Appropriate Behaviour

Young ones learn more from the actions and behaviours of other individuals they come across, especially adults. Clearly, it is important to provide positive modelling: act in the way that you would like your child to act. For example, be a kind person, do not get mad or angry for no reason, and swallow your pride and say sorry when you are wrong.

Managing Behaviour Issues

Even with positive discipline techniques, behaviour issues are bound to arise. Here are some strategies for managing common behaviour challenges in school-age children.

Addressing Tantrums and Outbursts

Temper tantrums are still common among school-going children when they have their tearful moments of tiredness, hunger, and inability to cope with pressures. In the case of a tantrum, do not get angry or upset, give a hug and tone down but do not compromise on the child’s demands. Once your child has cooled down, it is important to sit and basically explain to them what happened and what they could have done in order to avoid this.

Handling Defiance

It is also important to note that defiance is a frequent characteristic of a kid’s emerging independence. The first thing you can do when your child is acting defiantly is try to figure out why they are doing so. Maybe they feel ignored, frustrated, or want some attention. Tackle the behaviour and provide options to make them feel like they have some measure of decision-making.

Dealing with Lying

Children may lie so that they avoid being punished or to be accepted by other people. As a parent, if you find your child lying, ask about it politely, indicating to him/her why it is wrong to lie. Emphasise that the situation where one uses a dishonest approach is always worse than the one where, even if one gets punishment, he/she tells the truth.

Managing Sibling Rivalry

Competition between siblings is something which is observed in many families, especially where there are multiple children. Promote positive relationships with the kids through using positive language when addressing each of the children. Make time for each child and praise them for the good work they do. In case of emergence of conflicts, do not only encourage your children to work towards the correct solution but also let them know how they feel.

Addressing Bullying Behaviour

In a situation where your child is a bully, then we need to correct this vice as young as possible. Explain the consequences of their behaviours on others and the values on which the kids should embody, such as care and compassion. The key people who can help you work toward this end include your child’s school and teachers to come up with a way of managing the behaviour and assisting your child to make more positive decisions.

Managing behaviour in children of school age needs corporal punishment, direction, and love in equal measure. Through awareness of the developmental periods of school-age children’s behaviour, positive disciplinary measures and management of behaviour disturbances that may arise in the course of the child’s development, parents are able to direct their children to responsible and considerate conduct.